Her curvy silhouette casting a shadow on the wall, she is oblivious to all the chaos around her, standing in the midst of her living room, her thoughts a million miles away. She did not realize that her shadow created a picture on the wall, the bright light accentuating her reflection, making her bigger than life. All these people in her home, moaning and groaning in pain, she is oblivious to their pain, for the sting of death has pierced her already torn heart. She wears a black veil to conceal her sorrow, what will protect her raw wounded heart, what would cover the stabbing piercing pain that is inflicted deep down to the core of her heart. Who will help her carry this sorrow she is holding in her belly, a fiery heavy load that is ready to consume her from the inside out.
She loved him through and through, in and out to the deepest of his soul, but she could not keep him safe from death. Death was too strong for her to fight, his grip stronger than hers and it pulled him away to the abyss. She was just beginning to explore his mysteries, his deep love for her. She did not need much convincing, she had deeply fallen in love with him, the moment their eyes locked in an embrace. He was her deep calm ocean, her still waters that ran deeper than any ocean she had ever known. She was safe in him, in his heart, mind, soul and body. She trusted him with her most prized possession, her heart belonged to him, and his was hers for the asking. Like the piano cords, they knew each other’s rhythm and could play the same tune.
When death knocked at her door, it did not bring a notice. Like a midnight prowler, coming to steal, death snatched him away from her loving arms and did not give her time to say her appropriate farewell. Is there an appropriate farewell in death, who knows? Death is a thief. Her feet heavy like lead cemented to the ground, she could not move. Her mind wondered into that intimate space she shared with her husband. She never thought of herself as beautiful. She was a full figured woman, blessed with curves, which she never fully appreciated. She was mesmerized when this attractive wonderful man, requested for hand in marriage. At the time she could not fathom in her mind why this god of a man would even give her a first look. Her husband had said “Baby I love all that you are, you are not just your body but you are my heart for all eternity; my life partner to the end of time, the mother of my unborn children.”
Her mind drifted back to her broken heart, a grieving widow at 30. Who knew that the night snatcher would visit her family so early in her life? She looked around at children running outside, with no cares in the world. She placed her icy cold hands on her belly, her womb forever barren, never knowing the bundle of joy her belly could have hosted. She closed her eyes and began to weep as she saw her unborn baby in her day- dream, looking down from heaven, with the most precious dark mysterious eyes that she had seen before, her baby’s warm smile was familiar; she had met her daughter before in her husband’s face. She knew her husband would meet her unborn baby, a baby that was never to be. She embraced her belly tightly and knew that she now had two guardian angels to watch over her for all eternity. With new vigor and determination, she vowed never to cease her fight against this silent killer called high blood pressure, with its bitter poison. She whispered softly, “Death with your bitter sting, you do not win”.
Written by S. Pauline Zulu